Growing up, divorce wasn’t something that was openly discussed. Not many people I knew had gone through it, at least not publicly. Most couples I knew stayed married, unless a partner passed away. But in private, many of those relationships had ended long ago only the finances, children, and security kept them together.
I decided that wasn’t the life I wanted. I couldn’t live that way, not for me, and certainly not for the girls. The poison of an unhappy relationship would have been too much to handle.
So, when I chose to get a divorce, I had no real guidance on what it would mean for me and my girls. I did what any good parent would do, made the best choice I could based on what I knew at the time.
But if I could tell myself one thing back then, it would be this:
- The paperwork is just the beginning.
- You’re never fully severed from the other parent once children are involved.
- Be prepared to be blamed for everything.
- If you made the choice to split, be ready for the wrath of the absent parent.
- No matter how long you wait as a woman to move on, it’s never long enough.
- Get the missing parent’s role covered, or find a way to cover it yourself.
- Seek help for your children’s emotional needs.
- Pay close attention to the information your children receive from the absent parent.
I could go on and on, but here’s the truth: All the research and book reading you did before your first child? You need to do just as much, if not more, when it comes to your divorce.
It’s been almost 10 years now, and I’m still dodging bullets.
😁😄😆
Real Talk: Diary of a Seriously Fcked Off Parent 